Wednesday, January 11th, 2006 - 10:36 PM


Something’s up. I’m talking about a conspiracy.

There’s a parody of Yesterday, the Beatles song, called Leprosy (which I originally heard on Dr. Demento in the 80s). I’ve been googling for the lyrics, but all I’ve found are some failed attempts to recite it from memory (and some inferior attempts at original parody). WHY are there no accurate copies of these lyrics on the web? What is the web FOR if not storage of the lyrics of Leprosy for my convenient retrieval?!

I’m confident that none of the lyrics I’ve found are accurate, because NONE of them contain the brilliant line, “when my tongue fell out, I don’t know — I couldn’t say.” I’ve found some versions that have other portions right, and there are some recurring fragments that I don’t remember (which may mean they’re correct — I never memorized the song).

So, what’s the deal? This parody is too funny to have disappeared without help. Has it been banned by evil intellectual property censors? I hope not! Parody is a form of protected speech!

So… here are some fragments pieced together from my memory (jogged somewhat by other attempts I found on the web):

I'm not half the man I used to be,
Pieces just keep falling off of me,

When my tongue fell out,
I don't know, I couldn't say,

Now I've lost my chance for ecstasy,
How I despise my leprosy.

January 12, 2006 Update:
I found a web page (which I admit doesn’t look very authoritative), that claims Sony is stifling Beatles parodies. I thought Michael Jackson exclusively owned most of The Beatles’ music, but according to Wikipedia, Michael Jackson and Sony have co-owned the Beatles music since the mid-90s.

So… since I’m boycotting Sony I guess that means I won’t be buying any more Beatles albums.

6 Comments to “Leprosy”

  1. Rob Karl Says:

    I too am looking for the lyrics. You have a better memory then I. I cannot believe that these lyrics are not to be found. I will keep searching.


  2. Rob Karl Says:

    I found the words. Hope you get this

    What a sorry mess I am to see.
    Even friends can’t stand to look at me.
    Oh, I despise
    My leprosy.

    I’m not half the man I used to be.
    Pieces keep on falling off of me.
    It happens now
    So gradually.

    When my tongue fell off,
    I don’t know, I couldn’t say.
    I said, [*garbled*] “zump ping wong”.
    Now I long for that sweet day
    When I had no

    Making with me could never be.
    Yes, I’ve lost my chance for ecstasy.
    Oh I despise
    My leprosy.

  3. Woodpress » Blog Archive » Leprosy lyrics! Says:

    […] Rob Karl responded to my post lamenting the loss of leprosy lyrics with lyrics at least accurate enough to fool me. So, here are the lyrics he provided (unchanged with the exception of the word “love” which I think he unintentionally omitted). […]

  4. iowacrusader Says:

    One of my close friends asked me to look up the lyrics for the song … I needed them after he got it partially stuck in my head!

    For the second verse, he sings “muh muh muh,” instead of “zump ping wong,” by pushing his toungue against his teeth. But the rest of the lyrics are good to see.

    Much thanks.

  5. Shannon Says:

    That song was by Euphoria, a barbershop quartet from the Bay Area. I was there when it and a few others were being written while we were camping up in Yosemite. My father helped our friend Paul work on the lyrics. Man, we had fun!

  6. President Bowser Says: played this.

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